Forgive me, Kcalb
by Rebel Checkmate
Summary: After the battle with Ivlis, Kcalb suffered greatly. After his death, Etihw was never the same. EtiCalb, Etihw/Kcalb, Monochrome.


**Sakura Academy should be updated this week. I was playing The Gray Garden and I must say, it was quite an engrossing game. I very much favor Kcalb, Dialo, Froze, Ivlis, Greif, and Reficul. Although I must say Kcalb is most likely my favorite character. I do ship him with Etihw heavily, and this will be set after the quarrel with Kcalb and Ivlis. I hope you enjoy.**

* * *

A distinct knock could be heard. Etihw, absentmindedly and reluctantly, responded. It was practically automatic. "Come in."

It was head angel. Wodahs came in. "Lady Etihw," he started, looking perturbed. "Apologies for my concern, but perhaps this is not the healthiest way to spend your days. You know, locked up in your quarters." He still, however, kept his expression serious.

Etihw looked at the head angel, then back at the ceiling. "Who cares, a world without him isn't a world I want to live in."

"We are all tragically affected by his death, m'lady. It was truly emotionally melancholic, yes. But you are the Goddess of our world, you must make sure everything is in line and in order. I may be head angel, but I cannot act as a substitute to you. My power is nothing of that compared to yours, my possibilities are limited. I am incapable of repairing demolished barriers and ruling your kingdom." Wodahs responded genuinely. He could guard Blancblac Castle and command the angel army to do their daily chores and keep intruders out, but not much else. He wasn't God himself, Etihw was. The Goddess shot a sharp look towards him.

"Are you telling me you're not affected by the fact that your brother is dead?" It was true, Wodahs and him were brothers, in spite of the fact that Wodahs is an angel and his brother was the Devil of this world.

Wodahs immediately shook his head. "No, of course I am, he was my brother. But even though he is so longer with us, I must remain focused on my job, Lady Etihw." Etihw looked back at the ceiling. Her midnight hair was a jumble, and she wasn't wearing her chronic white diamond crown. Her normal gown was replaced with white, cross and diamond decorated nightclothes. Who knows how long Etihw has been locked in her room.

"It is simply a suggestion, but maybe a stroll in Blancblac's garden would be beneficial towards you." Head angel suggested, giving her an option. Etihw looked at him, then back at her roof. "... Okay. Thank you, Wodahs. You are dismissed." The one-eyed angel bowed swiftly, then vanished out of her quarters. The goddess lazily floated up from her bed, and levitating to her bathroom. She was in dire need for a shower, she reeked of sweat and secreted oils. She used magic to throw off her clothes and drifted in her shower. She turned on the faucet, and let the water flow throughout her already moisten body.

After the goddess's shower, she hovered out in a towel, her raven hair drooping below her shoulders. She used psychic to bring one of her gowns towards her. She reluctantly dressed in her normal attire, taking her sweet ass time. After she put on the gown, her hair had dried up, and she nestled her diamonds on her petite head. She pulled her light gray cloak over her, looking in the mirror. Her gray eyes were lugubrious and distant. She hid her arms in her cloak.

He never used the sleeves on his cloak.

Etihw floated all the way downstairs, running into Alela Grora and a few other servants along the way. She kept hearing the exact vexatious, bullshit, half-assed, and pure pity dialogue.

* * *

"I'm sorry for your loss."

"Do you need something?"

"Is there anything I can do?"

"He was a good man, Etihw."

"M'lady, he is no longer with us."

* * *

_Bullshit_, Etihw thought. _How jejune_. She didn't devoir that phrase, and nor did she lust after it. She abhorred it so much, it was arduous. Her glacial face scared off everyone else. Good, now she wouldn't have to suffer through the lies. She drifted over the floor sluggishly, her hands folded over her stomach and retaining a straight posture. Her gown slid over the surface behind her gracelessly. She opened the door to the garden, the serenity soothing her provoked disposition. She would always come with him here. Memories washed up in her mind like a tsunami, and soon, she was seeing every moment they spent together everywhere, in the middle of the garden, in all of the nooks and crannies and corners, in the sky, everywhere. There was a memory of her and him picking flowers, and Etihw making a flower crown for him. In another vision, her and him were sharing a picnic together in the evening. He was ingesting a cheesecake Etihw made.

"Wow, this is really good!" Those words touched her heart. Etihw was smiling in the memory, offering another slice.

In another memory, Etihw was sewing him cotton cuffs on his usual dark overthrow cloak. The old ones had apparently looked worn out and dirty, so the Goddess sewed news ones for him.

Even the garden smelled of his usual dark musk. Minty pine leaves and a faint hint of apple pie that Dialo baked on a chronic basis. Her favorite memory, and the most painful one, was right in the middle of the garden. Etihw and him were watching the full moon.

He loved the full moon so much.

She laid against his shoulder, his oversize coat over her. He normally wore a tuxedo, nothing too complicated and nothing too simpleton. Etihw liked his mop of messy white hair and his two curved black horns. His hair and his skin were possibly the only features about him that were whiter than snow. Even his pupils were a tad bit gray.

As if on cue, all of the memories were sucked clear from the garden. In the middle of where her most cherished memory played was a gravestone, with countless white diamonds hovering around it. If this castle were to be attacked again, this would be the only surviving remnant. Etihw swore on her life that nothing would ever happen to this even when Blancblac crumbled to nothing more than rubble, stone, and rusted supports. She stopped floating, and walked to the gravestone. She knelt down, bowing her head and arching her back.

She started to speak, a small smile on her otherwise distant expression. "Kcalb...," she whispered. "Although you may not exist in this world physically, I'm always thinking about you." She stopped to take a breath. She continued, "I miss you. More than words can say. There's so many things you haven't gotten to experience and yet also things you haven't gotten to see before. There's so many questions I want to ask you, but that's going to have to wait a while, isn't it?" Etihw laughed for what seemed like an infinite eternity. "I'm sorry that it had to be this way, I'm sorry I didn't heal you when I had the chance. I'm sorry that you went from a cane to a wheel chair to excessive sleeping until you died. I'm sorry you had to go through that alone. I'm sorry it turned out this, I'm sorry fate played its card this way. I'm sorry I never got to reveal how I feel about you." Etihw started to cry during her apology speech. "I really did love you, that alone was truth among my countless fibs." She laughed a bit, wiping away her dewy tears. "God, and now I can't even tell you that. Jesus, I am so pathetic, aren't I?" The Goddess looked up at the bright blue sky. "Give me a sign that you're still with me. Maybe then..." She stopped, looking at her lap and brushing her hair behind her pale white ear. "... I can move on with my life and actually be happy."

_Etihw._

She didn't seem too surprised by this sudden gust of wind whistling with his voice.

_Just simply look at the full moon. When you look at it, just remember that I am always here by your side, spiritually._

The wind stopped, and Etihw seemed satisfied.

"Thank you, Kcalb. That's all I needed to hear." Etihw left the garden, with a content look on her face.

Now that she had something to look forward to every few nights, she could have some closure and move on.

_Thank you, Kcalb._


End file.
